Ladies and Gentlemen, Boys and Girls, Children of All Ages –
Buckle yourselves in and get ready for a bumpy ride; it’s time for the Coffey Christmas Letter!
Hayley turned 16 this year (no, she didn’t) and is a sophomore at Lewis & Clark (nope). She also has a boyfriend (no, she doesn’t), complete with flippy hair. After many hours in line and two separate trips to the DMV she also has her learner’s permit (no, no, no). In an attempt to be like her mother, who “drives into houses,” she tried to drive through the neighbor’s fence (okay, she MIGHT have done that). Her parents may be in a little bit of denial. She also has a new hole in her head (she got her nose pierced).
Jeremy began his last pre-teen year this year. Jeremy enrolled in online school for junior high, to the great relief of mental health professionals, who were concerned with the fact that every teacher Jeremy has ever had needed to be committed. They hope that the buffer of a computer should help to preserve the sanity of Jeremy’s teachers. Of course, there is no such buffer between Jeremy and Paul, who is his learning coach. Betting is fierce for who will break first.
The highlight of Mollie’s year was having shingles (no, seriously, it was a really slow year). She was quite disappointed, because she was really hoping for a nice set of cedar shakes instead. The pain, scarring and discomfort of shingles barely edged out the second highlight of Mollie’s year – having the entire Wolfe family together for the first time in many years.
Paul decided to really freak everyone out by going to the Emergency Room not once, not twice, but three times in the space of one month. You know it’s not a good sign when the doctors and nurse in the ER start to recognize you. The good news is the cardiologists found the problem, a thoracic aortic aneurysm, and the main thing to do right now is just keep an eye on it. The bad news is that eventually it’ll need to be fixed or Paul’s chest will burst like in Aliens. Well, maybe not just like that, but…
Merry Christmas, everyone!
