1997

Dear Family and Friends,

Just a note to let you know how we are doing.
After winning $10 million in the Publisher’s Clearinghouse Sweepstakes and donating all of it to the Save-the-Dungbeetle Foundation, we all took a yearlong journey into ourselves to try to find our inner-children. (Paul found his running an illegal gambling and prostitution operation in New York.)
Hayley turned 3 in October, and has just sold the rights to her latest novel to a major movie studio. We are all very excited, as we will all be starring in it. I will be playing a 16-year-old Vestal Virgin. As you can imagine, the role is tailor-made for me.
Our new baby got 1598 on his SAT’s and has just finished composing his first opera. We think this is quite good, since he won’t be born until early next April.
In October we moved into our new home. It is a palatial 57-room mansion cunningly disguised as a 3-bedroom house. We are still trying to get everything unpacked and figuring out where to put the servants quarters.
Here’s hoping everything is well with all of you.

Love, Mollie, Paul, Hayley and Unnamed Child